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There are two types of sadness.

There is the surface level type of sadness that happens because there is a pull/tug on my heart (or it could just be my hormones) – and by the way, I just want to say “screw you hormones”. – And then there is this other type of sadness that goes really deep, it kills and chokes all other feelings.

That type of sadness is what drove me to do things to feel something else, anything else! I didn’t care what other feeling would take its place. I did everything to interrupt it when I started to feel it creeping up.